Tonight I tried on this amazing corset. It was the color of toasted coconut, overlaid with black lace, and it had gorgeous toasted-coconut-colored ribbon lacing up the front.

I have to be honest; it looked stunning on me. Apparently, I've got the kind of body that works well with a corset. My current build is of the Mae West dangerous curves variety, and a corset constrains and/or swells just the right parts, just the right way with that kind of body shape. But it wasn't only the sexiness of it. This may be surprising (it was to me), but it was incredibly, amazingly comfortable. Much more comfortable than any of the bras I was also trying on at the time.

I don't know why it's taken me so long to realize I'm corset-friendly. I've only ever owned one--and it was plain, white, and boringly utilitarian--bought quickly to allow me to wear a gown with a wide-cut and plunging neckline to a formal event. I never really felt particularly hot in it, though it did give me a nice shape. It reminded me of those old 1950s corsets you see in vintage Sears catalogues. Which, I supposed if done right, can have a cool retro appeal, but...

But it wasn't the same as this one. This was something else. It was pretty. It felt amazing. I loved it. I wanted it. I was certain I was going to buy it.

And then I put my shirt on top of it, just to test.

And it was awful. The shirt was somewhat form-fitting, and the lace and woven ribbon of the corset underneath made everything look lumpy and as if I was wearing something strange under my clothes. It didn't look sexily revealing, as in, "Oooh, I can tell that minx is hiding hot underthings beneath her clothing to get me aroused." It just looked...wrong. More like, "What the hell's wrong with her shirt?"

So I have to ask the women (or men) out there who have more corset experience than I do...how do you pull this off? I want to know, because for one, it was so comfortable, I'd like to wear one more often. Plus, to me, the corset's not nearly half the fun if you can ONLY wear it in the bedroom. For me, the point would be to be able to have it on under your clothes; a little secret for you, to keep you going through your day. Your secret supervillainess outfit. Or, even better, a little something you can reveal to the person you're with while you're still OUTSIDE of the bedroom, to get his or her desire moving TOWARD there. I mean, if you're already IN the bedroom, the corset's kind of besides the point by then, don't you think?

So people--any tips for wearing a corset well under regular clothing? Or is this just a lost cause and it's a bedroom-only proposition?

I've been doing some early spring cleaning this weekend and I've been dancing around the house to garage music a lot. It's all I can do to not throw things out the window, I'm so ready to just get rid of all my crap from miserable days past and just feel new and open and ready to start again fresh. It feels GREAT to purge all the old things I don't need anymore. And it feels even better to do it in a t-shirt and panties, with the window shades all the way up and sunlight coming in, screaming songs like this at the top of my lungs.

I wonder if my neighbors hate me now. But hey, I beat them, 'cause I'm awesome.

The song, by the way, is from the just-released CD from the Dollyrots, a band signed by one of the coolest women on earth, Joan Jett, on her Blackheart Records label. Go buy it, and stuff from all the bands on the label, because a dollar for Joan is a dollar well spent. I'm currently seething with jealousy because all of the Blackhearts Records bands did a showcase at SXSW this weekend. Hiromi, I hope you took full advantage, and maybe gave Joan Jett a kiss for me.

Scan of Heloise cover from Paula Wirth